My ten year journey in the US
This month has been quite emotional & introspective for me. It marks ten years of marriage and also ten years since I moved from India to the US. At the risk of sounding cliched, last ten years have literally been a roller coaster ride for me.
I moved to the US in 2009 on a spouse visa, the worst visa of its kind for an Indian National. This visa has been literally designed to break your spirit. Why? Because you are legally not allowed to work in this country. Now, I knew about this from my husband (my then fiancé) but I never understood the reality of it until it hit me.
At first, we didn’t live in New York City, we lived in New Jersey because we couldn’t afford to live in the city on a single income. The first one month was nice - new husband, new city, going out, eating good food. But, then things got routine - he left for work every day and I sat at home. I couldn’t even look for jobs because what was the point? I was NOT allowed to work. Period.
Now, just to put things in perspective, let me tell you a bit about my career back in Mumbai. My last job before I left was Senior Stylist for Harper’s Bazaar India. I quit in just a few weeks coz I met my husband and wanted to spend the summer in New York City and I was moving to the US at the end of the year in any case. But to get this job, ten years ago when people didn’t even know what exactly fashion styling was back in India, involved a lot of hustle. From a designer, I found a way to freelance fashion styling for TV commercials & music videos (yes I had my own business for a while) and then into editorial styling as an assistant to working my way up to being a senior stylist for an international publication. This involved a lot of hard work, discipline, tears, will power and hustle. Now here I was in the US at the peak of my career having to sit at home and watch reality TV all day. I found creative ways to kill time, like stalk people on Facebook, window shopping in the mall, and eating. I gained 10-15 lbs in the first one year.
Some of my styling work
My being at home and not having my own career or life also put a strain on our marriage. In my second year, my husband and I decided that the only way for me to get a work visa and make my way back into the work force was to go to a fashion school here in NYC. Fashion Institute of Technology (FIT) was the only affordable option since it was a public school. But, also very difficult to get into. We didn’t have enough money, so we thought we’ll put in our savings and then apply for a loan when we run out. Getting into FIT wasn’t easy since I didn’t have enough transferable credits so I had to take online courses, get credits and then apply. Even after all of that, I almost didn’t get in. But, I did. Life seemed meaningful again, although most of my classmates were much younger than me, it didn’t stop me from making friends & loving school. I learnt so much, it was an amazing school experience! I got two scholarships, which took care of half of my fees, so we didn’t really have to take a loan. I graduated with a Bachelors Degree in International Trade & Marketing for Fashion Industries with the highest distinction - Summa Cum Laude. I was interning in the buying department at Barney’s in my last semester and at the end, HR called me to tell me that they would have hired me. But they couldn’t sponsor my work visa, which they would eventually have to, after the first one year. None of the big brands/companies in fashion industry sponsored work visas, so I had to look for smaller companies and jobs that fashion girls didn’t kill for ;)
Won my first scholarship in FIT
So now, I was applying to jobs every day and starting my career from square one. Three weeks after my graduation, we brought Ari home. A spontaneous decision mostly by my husband who loved dogs! At the time, I was actually afraid of dogs, seems so stupid now! Ari was my good luck charm, I got a job within a week of him coming home. But, I hated to leave my 8 week old puppy and go work full time. But, I was also excited to go back into work force after more than 3 years. I got a job as Wholesale Production Co-ordinator in a small Jewish family run company that manufactured soft home goods. I met some great people, learnt a lot and tasted financial freedom in this country for the first time. At the end of the first year, we decided to move to London through my husband’s work. In London, I was allowed to work on spouse visa plus we could travel around Europe & this would speed up our Green Card process when we moved back to the US in a couple of years. So, we took the risk.
Ari’s first day at home & puppy training class
I got a full time job in London within the first two months. It was again wholesale production for a garment company, which involved working with overseas factories in Asia. Although I was good at it, the job was dry and I missed creating and styling. I moved to a better paid job after the first one year, but it turned out to me horrible. (will talk more about that in separate post) While all of this was happening in my career, we travelled to almost over 20 countries in 3.5 years while we lived in London. In my last 1.5 years in London I stopped working full time and started @honeyidressedthepug and my own brand Ari & M. We lived in a one bedroom apartment and the only extra space we had was in our kitchen. So that’s where Ari & M was born. I put a cutting table & sewing machine and started sewing every collar & leash myself. I barely made any money in the first two years, but I believed in what I was doing and knew I eventually would. My husband was doing well in his career and supported my decision.
Some travel highlights
We moved back to the US in September 2017 and within the first six months, I had my first paid collaboration for @honeyidressedthepug with a big brand. We also got our Green card and I got my freedom to work wherever I wanted without needing a work visa. Content Creation has now become my full time job. But, I still have a long way to go in terms of growing my brand. I pretty much work 7 days a week, but the growth is slow. I feel confused often and doubt myself most of the times. But, I still love what I am doing.
You guys and your support has been a big part of helping me have the freedom to work for myself. I am not sure how the next ten years would shape up my life and career, but I know I will figure it out :)
Always remember that “Your now is not your forever.” <3